noun: “A strong emotion caused by great worry about something dangerous, painful, or unknown that is happening or might happen.” (dictionary.cambridge.org)

Every time I leave it all behind I fear I will never again recognize any of that which makes me whole. Will I forever be a stranger to myself? Tomorrow I may have lost all hope of fulfilling my dreams just as I may be unable to remember what it is to dream.
Why is it so unclear? I am afraid despite being free. Alone and sad yet safe but helpless, and I have no idea how much longer I can keep my sanity from completely tearing into pieces.
Cynicism seems to shroud any last glimmer of optimism I may have subconsciously hoarded, and I am finally beginning to understand that there is no rescue from the misguided disorientation. I am able only to helplessly watch the happenings of the surrounding world as my life floats along a path designated by irrationality and angst. Impotent and powerless, I allow selfishness to dictate my decisions, driving away any sense of purpose or resolve.
Inevitably, when there is nothing else to say, those who offer consolation can fall only upon emptily assuring that “One day things will work out.”